I recall an experience from my childhood, where I was angry about something. For the life of me, I cannot recall what I was angry about, but I know I was really angry. And I was telling my dad about how angry I was and he just replied, “Who’s angry?” I agitatedly responded, “Me!”
“Who?”
“Me!!!” I yelled, even more irritated.
“Who’s me?” he replied with an annoying calmness.
“Your daughter!” I exclaimed.
This went on for a few more back and forth exchanges until finally, I realized I was now laughing, and what I was previously so angry about now seemed inconsequential. It completely diffused the situation. I didn’t really understand at the time what he was trying to teach me at the time, however, my dad is a philosopher, so I was accustomed to these sorts of exchanges.
What I understand now was that he was showing me that I was only angry because I was attached to my perspective of the situation. I could only see my view, and I was holding on to it. When he questioned me, I forgot about my viewpoint and just like that, the anger was gone.
So what does that say about the power of our thoughts? What if we paid attention to them? What would change? Just the other day, I was meeting with my coach and she pointed out that, while discussing my frustration with life getting in the way of my writing and such, that I was using language like, I have to and I need to. I didn’t even realize I was doing it! But that feels different from I want to work on my blog, or I can’t wait to be able to start writing again.
Have you ever focused on how you are talking to yourself and how you are talking about your hopes and dreams? I bet you have never given it a second thought. But the truth is our thoughts are vibrational messages that we are releasing out into the universe telling it how to treat us. So it really does merit our attention. Think about it. If someone makes a rude comment to you, you internalize it. It bothers you, even if ever so slightly. But why don’t we pay any attention to how we treat ourselves. That should be the person we care about most. Now I bet you’re I saying, no, my kids come first, my husband, my dogs, whoever it may be. But the reality is that, if we do not care for ourselves, we cannot be there for the ones that mean the most to us. So we really do need to pay attention to our thoughts. They have a huge impact on the way we see our lives and the world. Our thoughts even have an impact on how we treat the very ones we value most in our lives.
Imagine, if you think that there is no possible way for you to get through a difficult situation, odds are you either won’t or you will, but it will be far more excruciating than it had to be. But if you learn to control your thinking, you have the ability to hone in on what you can control and let go of what you cannot. It is empowering to think that we could have so much power over our own lives. All we have to do is change how we are thinking. It sounds so simple, yet it is actually quite a challenge to shift your established thought patterns. The truth is that you have likely not ever given your think pattern much focus. It is even more likely that you have not ever analyzed why you may think the way you do, i.e. your upbringing, your experiences, etc. After that, the next step is to then shift your thinking into thoughts that are more in line with your desires. It certainly is a process and a practice that you have to continually work on. But once you start to embrace it, you begin to see the results of your dedication fairly quickly. You start noticing that you are in a better mood, that something that you know would have bothered you didn’t. After a week or so, you start to notice opportunities that either were not there before, or you didn’t see because you were too busy complaining about everything else that was wrong.
It is really quite exhilarating to become the master of your own ship. It can also feel somewhat daunting because you are now admitting that you cannot blame anyone for your misfortune. It is all on you. So if you don’t like what you are attracting, it’s not your boss’s fault, it’s not your spouse’s fault, it’s no one’s fault except for your own. It is your thought pattern that you are communicating with the world about how to treat you. Perhaps you have heard the expression, You teach people how to treat you, meaning that how you allow others to treat you determines how people will continue to treat you. Well, this is similar. If you continue to send the vibrational thought messages out into the world about complaints, anger, injustice, the world perceives this as if this is the stuff you enjoy dealing with since you are focusing so much attention on them. But if you send thoughts of joy, love, compassion, understanding, the world also understands that is what you enjoy feeling and so draws that to you. It truly is a fascinating thing to try out and then witness it begin to work. I challenge you to take reins in your life. If you don’t like what you are getting, thoughtfully change the direction you’re heading. Happy navigating!